Sun. Dec.30.2007

12/30/07 Our grandson Mason, took 2 steps yesterday at his other grandparents while there for Christmas gathering, Esther reported to me. He's 10 months old and such a cutie. Yesterday while I visited Kenn, he was more alert than I've seen him for probably about 2 months. He focused better when I was talking to him. They are trying a medication that has been used for brain injured people and some have begun talking. I also talked to Barb, an LPN, who worked some with Kenn on Thurs. and Fri. night and she thought he was also more alert and focusing more. I told her it was nice to hear that. No one else has said anything but I realized that no one else is with Kenn enough to notice a change. Yesterday I was with Kenn from noon till 3:30 and it was nice to have him responding. I took him walking through the tunnel that goes between the 2 buildings and under the road. He was listening to scripture being read on a CD while looking at the murals on the wall of the tunnel. I also read to him and talked to him.
I have had people ask how I'm really doing. Well, when I was baking for Christmas, I was having problems. I'm having problems with my memory and attention span, which I've been told is all a part of dealing with trauma like I've had to deal with. I still need alot of healing too. Fri. night I watched 2 Christmas movies which I like doing but I sat crying so much. They brought back memories and then in the movie "Christmas Shoes" the boy's mom dies. WOW!! Did I cry!! Then just this afternoon I went into a tizzy when wood pellets started going all over the floor from a hole in the bag when I picked it up. Sometimes just little things happening can send me into a tizzy, where I just want to go sit in a corner and cover my head and not deal with anyone or anything. When I see it snowing again I think, stop snowing, I don't need another thing to do. I have a hard time getting up in the morning because I don't want to deal with anything, but once I'm up most of the time I'm fine. But you know what, this is just a season in my life and one day it will be over. God is so good, in my weakness then He is strong. He gives me the strength to keep going. I choose to keep praising God through it all. A friend told me I was like an Eveready Bunny because even though I might be tired or having a bad day if God wants to use me to encourage or to do something for someone I'll do it. She said you just keep going and going and going. I have to obey God and do what He wants me to.
My next update will be in the new year. That doesn't seem possible. Have a safe and blessed New Years to you all!!!!